Because It's Better To Be Irrational With Me Than Rational With Someone Else

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IT IS TOO HOT TO MAKE SENSE

In the dream I was contacted by Stan�s friend. Stan fell of the mountain and is now in ICU; he would like to see me before he gives the last breath away. I became nauseous. I didn�t even know what state he was in, let alone city. He would die without knowing that I cared. I woke up in tears. If I was normal, I would�ve texted him if he was all right. But I didn�t. I promised I would not bother him the whole time he was away. A week and a half. A painful week and a half. Instead, I bothered him without him knowing. Every day on his desk, I would leave an origami animal, a haiku, a picture... He didn�t bother to let me know how alive he was in the mountains either. Not that AT&T has perfect reception somewhere there in the mountains where he was soloing.
My boss decided to fill the empty void created by Stan.
�So today, at breakfast, I was telling my wife how you�� and he continued. Well, at that point I stopped listening. No wonder the woman gives me hate looks if the breakfast talks include me in them.

My city went through a heat wave, 95 and above. But to me, anything above the perfect 68F is a heat wave. I would bring two sets of clothes: my normal t-shirt and my whore tank-top for the case if the boss decided to avoid the lab on the hot day. He didn�t like to work on extreme-weather-days.

�It�s too hot. Why are you wearing jeans and a T-shirt,� my friend inquired.
�Because I am the only woman in my lab group.�
�Yea, I see your point. Your regular shirts show off a lot too. And you�re rude, vulgar, hardly ever speak without sarcasm, and you flirt with every man and woman possible.�
�Yea, so a tank-top would be a clear cut invitation for anybody to hit on me.�

After 10 AM I assumed the boss wasn�t showing up, so I changed into my whore outfit, leaving nothing for imagination. The moment I pulled the shirt over my belly, the boss walks in� officially, who knows, maybe he watched me change. Well fuck me sideways. That�s the moment he decides to walk in.
�It�s damn hot outside.� He states. And we have no AC. �I expected you to wear a dress or a skirt.�
Well, fuck me sideways and backwards.

FFW.

By day 5 I decided that since he saw me in my whore clothes, I should just embrace them and wear them throughout the heat wave. No Stan to jump my bones. I bang my fists on the desk leaving sweaty fist marks. �Boss, fix the AC.�
He crawls out from underneath the desk, from the hell of the network cables, he looks at me and then smiles, �You know, you�re cute sometimes.�
Fuck me diagonally?

My sweaty back is sweating buckets on yet another tank-top. I wore SPF 90+ this time. For sitting INside. The boss pats me on the back. Well, fuck me silly.
�What lunch am I buying you today?� He jokes.
�10 ounce cow drenched in melted cheese stuck inbetween delicious sesame buns.� I continue �working.�
�When is Stan coming back?�
Not soon enough.
�Miss him?�
�No.� Yes.
�Lunch?�
I get an email. �EMAIL!!!!!!� From Stan. He missed me. I promised not to bother him, but he bothered me instead. Sent a picture of something I asked him to. Took a picture of this just for you. I want him back. Alive. Will be back on Monday� possibly. It�s cool, I�ll hug the living shit out of you.
�Lunch?�
�Stan wrote back. He�s alive.�
�What he say?�
�That he�s not coming back ever again and that I should join him, not necessarily with him, but join him in escaping this ridiculousness that is work.�
�Lunch? Or you�re not eating anymore?�
I eat. Sometimes. It�s my control thing. I eat roughly 800 calories a day. If I eat more, I burn them off. I have no reason for anything I do. Control turns me on though. No matter what I control.

Stan should coordinate his vacation time with mine. If I didn�t enjoy my chill work set up, if I didn�t get away with the shit I pull, I�d probably sue for sexual harassment. But then again, it is my fault I flaunt my breasts and whenever I can I flaunt my ass while so ever conveniently bend down with my ass out while writing stuff. Life sucks. Live is annoying and boring. Damn, it�s hot.

12:13 a.m. - July 10, 2010

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