Because It's Better To Be Irrational With Me Than Rational With Someone Else
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And That's How Work Is NOT Getting Done At My WorkPlace
We were both underneath the desk poking at the carcass of some unidentified worm. �Can you believe it? We have worms,� I giggle. �It�s not a maggot, that�s for sure.� �See, they never vacuum or clean our office� no wonder.� And we poke some more. Comes in the Boss, and immediately backs off after seeing only our butts sticking out and hearing giggles coming from underneath the desk. �I�m afraid to ask what I walked into,� he says very slowly. We laugh. �Can you guys wait until I am done for the day to do whatever you�re doing?� He complains. We laugh some more. �There�s a dead worm, and we�re poking at its hairy carcass.� I offer explanation. Silence. �Uhm. Yes. I am afraid to think which is worse: what I thought you guys were doing, or what you are ACTUALLY doing.� He ponders. �Yea, definitely the latter.� And he walks away. Two weeks ago, Dr. HM (our just recently ex-coworker and co-habitant of our glorious office) came to CNY to surprise visit me, problem was, I happened to be unexpectedly in PA. When I came back, nobody told me he came around. Especially not Stan. I complained today to the Boss that nobody told me my favorite was here and no one bothered to let me know. The Boss said Stan was in charge of telling me. Stan complained that he did indeed tell me, I said no way in hell Jose, and then he�s like: Uhm� well I just told you now. So there. No there, bitch withheld this information because he is jealous of the attention I give HM. So today, to be as bitchy as I possibly could be, I constantly talked about HM. Omg, how awesome he was. How grumpy! How gassy! How I just completely miss him because he completed our dysfunctional family. Stan just listened. Then he went to tend to the laser. He came back hours later with a drawing. �I drew something for you.� And tapes it to my wall. He knows that more than anything, I LOVE his drawings. I think I succeeded in making him jealous. SCORE.
1:26 a.m. - July 29, 2010
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