Because It's Better To Be Irrational With Me Than Rational With Someone Else ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I KNEW IT!!! I knew I could not be proud of myself for my accomplishments (see previous entry). I knew something would be taken away from me.... something so extremely close to my heart... We had a small argument. A small one. He didn't speak to me for a week (I tried but all my tries went unanswered)... and now I get a text message: �the fact we did not talk, hurt me more than I let on. I met someone who understands my current situation. I still love and care for you. Wish you all the best.� WHAT?! Okay so I had the biggest crying fit ever. EVER. And while i'm leaving tens of voice mail where you can hardly hear what i'm saying since I am crying violently and wiping snot off my face... I am begging for a second chance... I am lowering myself to the levels I would have never lowered myself if See, my friends, I actually somehow skipped over the part where he mentions �meeting someone�. Twenty pleading texts and ten voice mail later, I re-read THE text message. Suddenly I felt like an idiot. Suddenly I felt my soul being sucked out. I stopped crying. I stopped feeling. I don't understand it. I really don't. I was mad because he blew me off without as much as a text message, so I let him know how hurt I was by that.... and THAT was our argument that �hurt [him] more than [he] let on� and within THAT week he FINDS SOMEONE WHO UNDERSTANDS HIM. Goddamit, imagine if we were married and had some serious arguments (which is totally normal).... how many �someones� would he meet then? Wow. Okay. Although my crying fit lasted only two hours, I still feel beyond hurt and betrayed. But I also feel relieved (strangely) and empty inside. I hope I can get over this really soon. Please, God, please... 12:57 a.m. - April 08, 2011 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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