Because It's Better To Be Irrational With Me Than Rational With Someone Else
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My PhD Made Me Obsolete In Human Language
I was on the phone with a Rep of some Luxury Car Headquarters. They were all about making me happy because of certain circumstances that put them in a little pickle.
"Blah blah fissure blah blah blah blah blah blah blah fissure blah blah blah blah blah blah." I say.
"I don't understand," she says.
"Uhm..."
"Can you please explain?" she asks.
"Uhm... yes? So... uhm... okay." I stumble. I'm confused how this was confusing, but I was stumped with worse questions1, so I continue. "Blah blah blah blah fissure blah blah blah blah."
"Continue."
"Blah blah blah blah blah blah fissure blah blah blah." I continue.
"Hmm, yes. Continue."
Then I continue for another 15 minutes with brief ahas and yeses.
"I apologize, but I do not understand." She states.
Now, this is new.... what was there not to understand?
"I'm not sure how I can... how I can clarify this. Which part is confusing?" I am utterly confused how this lady did not understand my problem.
"Well... I do not understand what the word 'fissure' means." She states.
I am silent.
For a long while.
"Uhm... fissure?" I repeat.
"Yes. What does that mean?" She asks.
"Uhm... it means... a narrow crack." I state.
Silence.
A long silence.
"So can you help me?" I resume.
"Can you please repeat the story again? So I can get full understanding of what happened?" She asks.
"Uhm... you know what, nevermind. You cannot help me." I hung up.
I grabbed a dictionary, because now I started doubting myself and thought that maybe I actually made up this word. But soon I knew that I didn't. Am I over-educated since I know a word like "fissure"?
How is it that I, a foreign born and raised, know a word like "fissure" and a born and raised American doesn't? Am I over-educated?
If you do not know a word that is essential to the whole story, why would you continuously ask me to continue for the next 20 minutes, rather than ask me right off the back? People like this, I condemn to the lowest rings of hell!!!! Yes, lets put more money towards sports and reduce funding for actual education. Smart move there. Fucking fissure. --
1 A chemistry student, a college Freshman in a Nursing program nonetheless, approached me one time, confused why 1 * x = x. While I know a page proof of why that works, I was completely stumped by the question. I thought I misunderstood, but no... I didn't. The question was genuine and it regarded why 1 times something gave something. Other time the same student asked me what a 'fraction' was. That student will be a Nurse. Keep that in mind next time you go to a hospital.
12:54 a.m. - February 18, 2012
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