Because It's Better To Be Irrational With Me Than Rational With Someone Else ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Because According to My Psychiatrist I Am Quite Normal I used to want to be a psychiatrist. Not one that has her own private practice or works in hospitals, I wanted to be the one that works in those hard core mental facilites where all the rooms are white padded rooms. You know, those places that were being heavily medicated is not a recommendation but a requirement; where straight-jackets aren't unuasual but are the facility's uniform; where having an imaginary friend isn't crazy at all but normal; where... you get the idea. Unfortunately, I was advised to see a psychiatrist rather than become one. Then, I wanted to be a computer programmer; one that deals with anti-hacking and anti-identity theft software.I also wanted to be a geneticist. Not one that does cloning of humans because that's just weird. I understand cloning organs because organs are cool, but humans are not... so that's why cloning humans isn't cool. I then realized that I do not want to deal with sick people because sick people make me sad, sometimes as much as sick homeless animals.Then I wanted to work with chemicals and viruses in facilities where you wear those X-Files-type of space-suits. But since I'm clumsy as hell I'd probably contaminate myself and others with those viruses.Right now people feel happy and satisfied when I tell them I want to be a scientist/Chemist and want to mix chemicals and find new medicines and cures and what not. Originally, I said I wanted to work on things that explode and cause fire and work for the government where it's legal to work on things that explode and cause fire. However, people were not happy to hear that and some thought I was joking and some thought that I needed help. I asked my psychiatrist if he thinks I need help. He said "ignoring the fact that you have ADHD and quite a few OCDs (obsessive cleaning and organizing things according to color, length, alphabet... etc, and other) and few theories on life that some may think are ridiculous (my theories on how to lead a happy and fulfilling life), you're quite normal." I am afraid that doctors are supposed to say that because everybody is normal it's just that few are far more detached from reality than others. I don't tell my psychiatrist much, I just go there to pick up my ADHD pills and leave. I tell Dr. Steve (my neurologist) more than I tell anybody else but less than he wishes I did. He acts like he understands and cares, and he doesn't talk in monotone like psychiatrists tend to. He also calls me irrational or stupid if I say something that according to him is irrational or stupid; psychiatrists think that everybody is rational and of average-intelligence... but also in the need of pills.12:46 a.m. - March 05, 2006 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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